Top Sci-Fi and Fantasy Moments of 2014

The era of the geek is alive and well!

2014 was a great year for sci-fi and fantasy, and there were so many awesome moments that I couldn't list them all. It took great deliberations with several luckily won $25 movie cards and multiple Redbox coupons to see many of these movies, but I have made a list of what I think were standout moments in film and TV for sci-fi and fantasy moments.

This list is in random order, although there is a #1 moment, and that of course will be all the way at the bottom. Please be advised that there are many sci-fi/fantasy movies and shows from 2014 that I either did not get a chance to see, or I did see and just didn't find anything too special about. Also, MAJOR spoilers ahead!

Captain America: The Winter Soldier - The elevator attack

Hailed as one of, if not the, best Avengers superhero film to date, Captain Steve Rogers finds himself in the middle of a coup burgeoning from the very heart of S.H.I.E.L.D. when internal Hydra agents emerge and take over the entire establishment. In their first move, they try to take out Steve when he refuses to surrender the information Nick Fury gave him with the info on Hydra. This particular scene has a beautiful buildup in suspense as Steve begins to notice fishy behavior in the men that have accompanied Agents Caws on the elevator, and then slowly fills with more men that almost surely toes the maximum limit. Then, in an excellently choreographed scene in a tiny glass elevator, all the agents turn on and try to take out Steve, which he of course able to foil, but not before he offers one of the best movie lines of the entire year: "Before we get started, does anybody want to get off?"

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. - Fitz's tears

Piggybacking on the last moment, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., the latest show in the Marvel and Whedonverse, got off to a rough start, but flew true when Hydra emerged. There were so many awesome moments, especially in the first half of season two with Skye's origins being revealed, but I went with a rare moment rather than spectacular or shocking. This particular episode, working the very day following the ending of The Winter Soldier, showed how the recently resurrected Agent Coulson and his team attempt to keep the remaining S.H.I.E.L.D. agents alive to repel Hydra. In this episode, Coulson, Melinda May, and Leo Fitz are cornered by many Hydra agents with no foreseeable escape routes. They are offered the chance to join Hydra and live, which Coulson and May staunchly turn down. Then the camera pans to Fitz. Fitz is a scientist and not a field agent with the weapons and combat training that the rest of the team has. With tears in his eyes, he refuses Hydra as well, knowing full well doing so seals his doom. What makes this moment one of the best is that is that Fitz has the most honest and most human reaction to the situation. He is a good man who will stick to his convictions, but also won't lie about his internal struggle and wanting to live. He represents what any normal person would likely do, and it's about time someone showed a more realistic character in a fantasy based show. The full episode is below, so jump to the 34 minute mark to see Fitz' best moment.

Divergent - Tris' sky ride

I haven't read these books yet, but this particular scene stands out as showing the kind of life that Tris is in for. Though she follows the young adult fictional heroine flaw of not being completely likable, she is able to show her determination for becoming an acceptable member of the Dauntless by adapting and not giving up. She has leaped from a moving train and off a building, fought her way to be accepted, and is now being initiated by taking a zip line over the city. It is a beautiful and mesmerizing scene as the sails across the skyline, and through ruins and abandoned buildings. Though the city is obviously computer generated, it still looks real enough to feel like we are taking this ride with Tris.

Big Hero 6 - The villain's introduction

Disney's latest film was a great movie, but one particular scene stood out among the rest. Hiro, a teenage prodigy, created specialized nanites for construction purposes that were seemingly destroyed when an explosion took out a college building with a respected professor and Hiro's older brother, Tadashi. Tadashi's medical robot, Baymax, is programmed to to help his patients in whatever way possible until they are satisfied, and believes that the one nanite that Hiro kept is trying to reach the others. Hiro follows Baymax and the nanite until it reaches a factory that is creating more of them, and we meet the villain: Yokai. A dark, menacing figure wearing a kabuki mask riding on massive waves of these nanites emerges, and he is scary. The fact that we don't see his face and that he mercilessly tries to kill Hiro and his friends right away shows that this guy is a force to be reckoned with. Very few Disney villains have been introduced with a strong sense of darkness, giving you the impression that he's going to be an interesting one to watch. The video below features some stills of his introduction, but the clip itself is as of yet unavailable.

Edge of Tomorrow - You can't beat Cage in a fistfight

This Halo meets Groundhog Day film didn't get the numbers in the theaters it deserved, but it certainly did get good reviews. Tom Cruise's Cage has been experiencing the same 2 days over and over when he is killed on the battlefield against aliens called Mimics when he comes into contact with one Mimic leader's blood. There are many awesome and funny sequences in this film, but the one that lands on this list is one when Cage is confronted by two other members of his squad. Skinner and Kimmel are ticked off because Cage sneaked away, resulting in their doing hundreds of push-ups for their sergeant, and call him out for a lesson. Cage tries to talk them out of it, then closes his eyes and puts his hands behind his back, dodging every punch Skinner throws at him and weirding Kimmel out. It makes you wonder how many times Cage had to experience that do avoid those blows with such grace! This clip is currently unavailable on YouTube, so please enjoy the movie trailer and then see the movie for yourself if you haven't yet.

 X-Men: Days of Future Past - Quicksilver works his magic

Quicksilver, though popular in the X-Men universe, had yet to really be given a chance in the films, and this particular movie finally gave his younger self time in the spotlight, and then some. After having broken Magneto out of the freaking Petagon(!), a teenaged Quicksilver reunites with Wolverine and Xavier to finish the escape. They find themselves in the kitchen, cornered by 5 security guards with plastic guns pointed at them. Magento is about to command the knives to butcher them all, but Quicksilver beats him to it. At his top speed, he puts his goggles on, moves the guards into positions where they all take themselves out without shooting, moves the knives out of the way, samples the soup of the day, steals a hat, and deflects the bullets that were fired; all while Jim Croce's "Time in a Bottle" is playing. This isn't the first time a scene like this has been done, but few have been executed this smoothly with good pacing and comedic flare.

The Hunger Games: Mockingjay, Part 1 - The war anthem

While a camera crew follows heroine Katniss Everdeen to capture her image of being the Mockingjay, they all take a lunch break by a river and Katniss spends some time with the mute cameraman, Pollux. Pollux motions to her, asking her to sing for him. Softly, she begins to sing a folk song called "The Hanging Tree." Though there's nothing special about how she sings it, it's the message of the ability to go beyond expectations that reach the masses. As she continues singing, the song becomes more powerful with the addition of music, and then her voice and image is replaced with a chorus of woodsmen and women singing as they march against the Capitol's elite forces in District 7. The execution of this song, as well as the instant inspiration it develops, demonstrates just how desperately Panem needs deliverance from their government, and how even a simple song can bring the motivation needed to take action. This is another moment with the clip being unavailable, but the song itself is below.

Arrow - Barry tries the salmon ladder

Arrow has had a knack this year for throwing curveballs at its viewers, such as Black Canary's death and the midseason cliffhanger of Oliver getting stabbed, but let's face it: many fans of Arrow look forward to the episodes when Oliver Queen mounts that bar for the salmon ladder. Well, when Barry Allen comes to town in a crossover episode, guess what he wants to try? You don't even see anything at first, all you can see is Caitlyn and Felicity discussing Oliver's ladder routines while crazy clanking is heard in the background. And then, we see what's causing that noise: The Flash is trying out the salmon ladder at his super speed. It's a very quick sequence, but impressive and with a fantastic ending line: "I don't see what's so hard about that."

Games of Thrones - Sansa rises to power

Let's face it, Joffrey's death broke the internet, and Tyrion's speech not getting actor Peter Dinkledge a well-deserved Emmy nomination were definitely standout moments this season. However, Sansa Stark's entry into the current game for the throne of Westeros wins the place on this list. When we first met Sansa, she was a naive girl who caused all the trouble she found herself in, even accidentally contributing to her father's untimely death. Now, after being accused of conspiring to kill Joffrey, she escapes from the Lannisters with the slippery Petyr Baelish, and she can exact her revenge. All this time, the Lannisters have kept her prisoner in the open, not thinking that she had the smarts to do anything against them. However, in this interview with actress Sophie Turner, she said that Sansa's superpower is "being polite." By staying under the radar, she has picked up more intelligence than the Lannisters considered. Now, as she allies herself with a man who loved her murdered mother, she changes her look; and even her walk has changed to show self-assurance and purpose. There is no more naivete, only a sense of powerful confidence emanating from her. Look out Lannisters, here comes Sansa!

Almost Human - a dark insight into future social networking

FOX did it again: they took a perfectly good sci-fi show, aired it out of order, and got it cancelled. This futuristic buddy-cop show pairing Karl Urban's gruff cop Kennex with Michael Ealy's android-made-to-be-human-like Dorian was fun with perfect chemistry between the two leads, but it wasn't given a decent chance from the network that cancelled Firefly. One way the show stood out was that it was full of dark ideas on what the future may hold, one of which makes this list. In episode 7, "Simon Says," an internet icon named Simon has his own channel on the internet and goes to the extreme of planting bombs on civilians and making them explode if they didn't do exactly as he says. The moments worth mentioning are when Simon is looking at the responses from viewers. He has millions of people tuning in to see what happens, and almost every one of them leaving a comment telling him to blow that person up and/or insulting the victims. Few, if any, try to plead for that innocent person's life. It's a very dark image of the future that we don't normally see, but also includes a message that we should all consider: is this what social media will turn us into one day? There aren't any clips of this episode, but the full episode is available online. Here is a preview for this episode.

Guardians of the Galaxy - Starlord's dance

If I could put a full film on this list, it would be this one. However, I'm only going based on awesome moments so I have to pick just one part. That being said, the only beef I had about the film was the opening sequence with Peter's mom dying, as it didn't quite set the right mood for the film and should have been used as a flashback. Then, when everything switches gears, the movie gets on track, and we get to the one moment I believe works as the best one for the list. With the credits rolling as a grown up Peter Quill, now known as Starlord, rocks out to "Come and Get Your Love" by Redbone on his walkman as he dances, splashes in puddles, and kicks the local wildlife out of his way. This scene was where the actual movie should have begun, and finally does set the right mood: all action and laughs for the rest of the ride!

Earth to Echo - Echo disassembles and reassembles a big-rig

This cute E.T. styled found footage flick didn't do too well in the box office, but one of the sequences hinted at in most of its previews and trailers was a big-rig truck being shot to pieces and then put back together. The full scene, which obviously goes into more detail, shows how 13-year-old Alex is driving a car to break his friends and Echo, the alien with telekinetic powers, away from government officials who want to destroy Echo's means of getting home. Alex has no experience driving and is passing on the wrong side of the street as the big-rig is about to hit them head on. The CGI heavy scene shows how Echo blasts the truck apart, piece by piece, all of which are avoiding Alex's car or anything at all in the area. The pieces of the truck linger in the air as they pass, and the bemused truck driver, still harnessed to his seat, watches in shock as he passes the car safely, and the whole truck is put back together again in a matter of seconds before he brings it to a screeching stop. Though this movie is by itself okay, the truck scene is the best part and shows how Echo has the mindset to preserve life, and can do it by any means possible. The clip itself is not available, but the shortened version is below in the trailer.

The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies - Elrond. Just Elrond.

The first 20 minutes of this film were the best, and the two hours that followed was still good but just wasn't as cool. Galadriel and Gandalf are cornered by the still ghost-form Nazgul. They taunt her, but she tells them she's not alone. Then, all else dims as Elrond strides into the scene, sword in hand, and a presently-still-aligned-with-the-good-guys Sarumon steps in, offering assistance. The focus returns to Elrond, and Hugo Weaving delivers his introductory line with hints of V and Agent Smith: "You should have stayed dead!" We've seen him in all 3 LOTR movies and in An Unexpected Journey, but Lord have mercy, he epitomizes coolness right here. Unfortunately, that's pretty much all the time he gets in the movie but if any actor took advantage of all the screen time he got, it was him. And Christopher Lee makes a close second!

Snowpiercer - the blackout

I doubled checked the release date, it was supposed to come out in June 2013 but came out in January 2014 instead so it barely makes this list. The tail section of a train that holds the last of earth's survivors of the man-made ice age makes their move to take the engine of the train so they can better their treatment. They reach a hall before the engine room, and the soldiers blocking their way are all armed and wearing night vision goggles. Then, the train enters a tunnel and everything goes black. The tail section begins to panic until one of them yells for fire. Earlier in the film, a child recovered a book of matches; and from the very back, he lights a torch and runs forward, passing it to another passenger whose son was taken from him at the beginning of the film. It isn't just light they are bringing forth, it is the hope that they can succeed in their crusade to be treated equally with everyone else on the train. Of course, with the torch brought to the fighters, the soldiers lose their upper hand and it becomes anyone's game. This scene also stands out for the mercilessness of Mason (Tilda Swinton), who stands back with a pair of her own night vision binoculars, enjoying every bit of seeing people beneath her slaughtered. Again, the clip is unavailable, so here's the trailer.

Once Upon a Time - Neil breaks through for his family

Another series that broke the internet this year with its incorporation of Elsa from Frozen, Once Upon a Time is no stranger to crazy twists and is about as convoluted as they come. The series' most evil villain to date, Zelena, the Wicked Witch of Oz, has distorted Regina and Snow's curse to restore their people to Storybrooke so they can save Emma and Henry, whose memories have been changed (and that's just the beginning!). She has altered the curse to wipe everyone's memories of returning to the Enchanted Forest so they can't stop her; afterwards she brews a double portion of a potion that will retain and restore memories. She drinks one and gives the other to Rumplestiltskin/Mr. Gold, as both are under the impression that his son, Bae/Neil, was killed while resurrecting Rumple, and he wants to remember him. In reality, Neil isn't dead just yet; his consciousness has been absorbed into Rumple's body (is that convoluted enough yet?). Zelena leaves and Rumple is about to take the potion, but Neil manages to break free of his father's body just long enough to call a dove and pen out a message to his old friend Captain Hook to find Emma and give the memory restoration potion to her. Rumple is one of the most powerful fiends in this world, and for Neil to summon enough will to stop Rumple, even for a minute, is no small deal; there's no doubt that it was his love for Emma and Henry that gave him the strength he needed to save them. Although Neil died for real later on that season, this final act of heroism helped bring the eventual destruction to Zelena.

Once Upon a Time in Wonderland - Will ends Alice's suffering

This OUAT spin off was disappointing and lasted only one season, despite its having a good amount of potential. Although it also used convoluted storytelling, the show did wrap up every plot nicely and gave a satisfactory finale. One of the better parts of this show that made it worthy of being on this list came when Alice and her genie lover, Cyrus, reunited, and not just because it finally got Alice to shut up about finding him. Will Scarlet, formerly of Robin Hood's Merry Men and formerly Knave of Hearts, was saved in an earlier episode when Alice made a wish to save his life in that if he died, she died. When Jafar tries to kill Anastasia, aka Cinderella's stepsister aka the Red Queen aka Will's ex, she tries to divert his power but it strikes Will, which in turn affects Alice. She has one wish left which she gave to Will in the first episode, so to save her life he makes his wish: "I wish for Alice's suffering to end." In a flash, their bond is broken, Alice is okay, and Cyrus hasn't returned to his bottle! At first it looks like Will may have freed Cyrus from the bottle until Cyrus and Alice turn to find Anastasia crying. Sure enough, Will is gone. One of the most unselfish acts of his life has now put him in his new career: the genie in the bottle!

Doctor Who - It's always important to make a good first impression

We lost Matt Smith last year and were bestowed Peter Capaldi, who we only got to see about 15 seconds of in the series 7 Christmas special. With the series eight premier, viewers and Whovians would finally get to know the new Doctor. The episode opens in Victorian England, where there's a T-Rex on the loose(!), and the Tardis shoots out of its mouth. It finally lands, and one of the Doctor's acquaintances in this era, Strax, orders him to come out and surrender. Well, the new Doctor ain't having any of that. He opens the door and says one word: "SHUSH!" And shuts the door in Strax's face. Good impression for Strax? No. Good impression for us? You bet!

Supernatural - tackling a much debated issue: fan fiction!

In this day and age, a TV show normally does a musical episode to either garner higher ratings or try to show that they're not running out of fresh ideas (yeah, like we're fooled). In this case, Supernatural airs its 200th episode, and it's about a musical fan fiction about Sam and Dean's lives! Throughout the series, the Winchester boys have endured de-souling, demonic possession, prophetic stories about themselves, geek conventions of their adventures, and plenty of dealings with death; but nothing prepared them for this! In this episode, Sam and Dean walk onto an all-girl school campus to investigate a disappearance and instead witness the rehearsal of this fan-fiction-turned-musical about their lives in complete and utter shock (with undertones of horror). This episode plays out very well how fictional characters would probably react if they themselves had a chance to read what their fans wrote about them. It was an imaginative take on the subject and good twist on the musical themed episode premise.

The Flash - perfect for each other

This may be considered cheating since I already referenced The Flash and Felicity in the Arrow moment, but this is a completely different show so that's why I'm using it. Barry Allen, aka The Flash, and Felicity Smoak are friends, and she comes into town to help him out with his latest crisis. Once everything is solved, she hops a train back to Starling City, which Barry joins her to say goodbye. Felicity tells Barry that she knows he is in love with Iris, and he tells her that he knows of her feelings for Oliver Queen (the Arrow). In a moment of pure honesty, both Barry and Felicity reach the conclusion that they are perfect for one another, but it will never happen. This particular scene makes the list because, despite us rooting for each one to wind up with the one their hearts choose, we the viewers want to see them get at least a little affection, and it is delivered. After promising to be there for one another, Barry says his goodbye, then moves in for a kiss. Felicity makes her own move, and the two share a sweet kiss that has just the right amount of affection that they need right now. Though we're (probably) still rooting for them to wind up with Iris and Oliver, it's still satisfying to know that they aren't alone in their struggle. Or maybe it's a hint that these two will make it together someday?

Teenaged Mutant Ninja Turtles - the cold doesn't bother them anyway

In typical Michael Bay style, there are explosions, slow-mo techniques, and generally defying the laws of physics all throughout his movies. This scene from TMNT is no different, but only the turtles could have pulled it off. While trying to escape bad guys, their big-rig truck goes off course and down a snowy mountain. Soon, all the turtles are riding the snow too, sometimes attached to cables shot at them by the baddies, the rest of the time trying to survive whatever is in their path. There's the turtles surfing an avalanche on an off-roader, dodging cars left and right, and daring rescues all at once. With any other film, this would have been ridiculously silly, but somehow, Bay made it work.

The Walking Dead - you like that leg medium or well done?

Hannibal may the resident cannibal on the airwaves right now, but The Walking Dead is no ordinary show. This current season is cranking out the shocking moments like gumballs from a penny machine (aww, you made Daryl cry!), but it's the cannibalism that sticks out for 2014. Poor Bob is the unlucky victim who was in the wrong place at the wrong time, and gets whacked over the head by the exiled Gareth, who then explains how he and his band of outcasts have had to evolve to survive. He wraps up his speech by telling Bob that what he's done is "nothing personal," and the camera angle changes to show that Bob has had his left leg above the knee chopped off. If that ain't bad enough, Gareth starts chewing on the freshly BBQed leg right in front of him, commenting on how he tastes! Though not as smooth as Hannibal is, Gareth certainly serves this scene with just the right amount of creepiness.

The Amazing Spiderman 2 - the tease for those in the know

Those of us who were familiar with Peter Parker's back story knew that his love with Gwen Stacy was doomed from the start, and the filmmakers obviously wanted to draw this climactic scene out as long as they could. As Spiderman and Green Goblin battle in a clock tower, Gwen is secured by a web so she won't fall. Then the Green Goblin cuts that web and Peter shoots out another to catch her. The scene drags out to slow motion as Gwen and debris heed the call of gravity, and the web almost seems to stretch out as tiny fingers to catch Gwen. The web magically misses every piece of debris in its way and finally reaches Gwen square in the midsection. Spiderman canon has Gwen dying when the web catches her by the leg with such force that her neck breaks from whiplash, so the angle at which this web catches her seems to make that outcome less likely. For one brief, glimmering moment, it looks as though this movie will break canon. Then, as the web becomes taut to pull Gwen back up, she whacks her head on the ground, delivering a fatal blow to her head. Though many expected this to happen, it wasn't expected to be done in such a teasing way and with such an emotional wallop; and Andrew Garfield's reaction to her fall is heartbreaking, adding to the tragic scene. The filmmakers did their part in drawing out hope to the very last second for Peter and Gwen. Too bad they didn't take that kind of care with the rest of the film.

Dawn of the Planet of the Apes - Maurice makes a friend

This prequel sequel (ha ha ha, laugh all you want, you know that's what it is!) picks up after the Simian virus wipes out most of mankind, and the few survivors live separate from the human-like apes led by Caesar. A very fragile truce is struck by Caesar and Malcolm, a man who is trying to restore power for San Francisco. Maurice, an orangutan, is curious about their new human associates and sneaks out to study them. Malcolm's to-be stepson Alexander sees him and offers him a comic book to read. The second time Maurice comes around, Alexander is waiting with a bigger graphic novel. Malcolm and Ellie, Alexander's mom, wake up to find the two bonding while Alexander explains the premise of the novel to Maurice. Not only is it a light moment in a primarily dark film, it also shows how easily the apes and humans could get along if they only gave it a simple try.

Interstellar - the explosion only appreciated in the theater environment

Christopher Nolan's 2001 meets Contact film was well done from start to finish, albeit confusing and a bit on the preachy side. That aside, there are many scenes in this film that were particularly impressive, but I picked one that doesn't need an in depth explanation. Dr. Mann is looking to hijack the Endurance space station but has not docked his ship to access port properly. While Coop literally begs him over his intercom to not open the pod bay door-excuse me, the hatch, Dr. Mann begins to ramble off his reasons for his actions when he does open the hatch, and the section of the station explodes. It has long since been proven that sound does not travel in space, so when the hatch blows, there's no sound at all. Since there's no sound, you can literally hear everyone around you, from gasping to going, "whaaaat?" The lack of sound has a direct affect on all who watch it, and it is an affect that will not have a big of impact when it is released in digital or hard copy format. Nolan's style of film making is always changing, and this particular method was very effective. This is another clip that is not available, so please enjoy the movie trailer.

And now: The Moment You've All Been Waiting For! The #1 Top Sci-Fi/Fantasy Moment of the Year!

#1: The Star Wars Episode 7 Trailer

Come on now, is this really a big surprise? 2015 is going to be chalked full of reboots, sequels and prequels, but who can deny that the new installment of Star Wars is the most exciting??? J.J. Abrams has been mum on the details, and little to no information about this film was released until the post-Thanksgiving trailer. Too bad companies like Target and X Box Live don't have the firewall systems like Bad Robot and Disney have! Anyways, you've probably already seen the trailer, but I'm putting it here just the same.

Barely Ineligible Honorable Mention: "Agony" from Into the Woods

Although this film is technically a fantasy, its primary genre is as a musical and it sticks to the musical comedy layout, so it's not officially eligible for this list; hence the reason why it is an honorable mention. The song, "Agony," is one of the funniest songs to ever come out of Broadway, but can easily be done wrong if it's taken too seriously. With musicals onscreen, songs like this don't normally make the transition well. In this case, it is not only pulled off well, it's pulled off flawlessly by Chris Pine and Billy Magnussen who throw around the silliness of the situation with just the right amount of ham. Just how impressive was it? Well, when I saw this in the theaters, I saw it with a group of theater actors in my area, and we were all applauding when this song ended. That's saying something!

Thank you for reading my list! There are other movies and shows that I didn't get a chance to see so if you didn't see your favorite moment here, then write your own blog!

In the meantime, I will be taking lots of notes for 2015! This will be a good year for geeks!

The Hobbit's Tale and The Geek Girl's Thoughts

Beware of spoilers!

I just got back from watching The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies, and while I was satisfied with the movie, there was an element missing that I would like to point out. If you haven't read my blog before, I'd like to say first off that I am a multi-fandom geek who is mostly into sci-fi (Trekker would probably be most accurate term), but I do dabble in fantasy as well and other geeky fandoms as well.

This blog is not a review on the film, but rather on the element that kept me riveted to The Hobbit trilogy. My history with Tolkien is a bit odd: I was raised by a Tolkien fan but I didn't have much interest in it, not even when the Lord of the Rings trilogy was released. I only became interested when I played the MMORPG Lord of the Rings Online and got to learn more about the history of Middle Earth through the quests. By the time The Hobbit was released, I was interested enough in the franchise to go see An Unexpected Journey without the promise of Orlando Bloom (so sue me, I was a teenager when the LOTR movies came out!).

Now that I've seen the final film, I can point out how the trilogy affected me. The film itself was well done, although I was left a little disappointed, and this is why: the dwarves.

That may sound a bit odd since the dwarves were the main characters along side the hobbit himself, Bilbo Baggins. The reason why I loved this franchise more the LOTR trilogy was all due to the 13 dwarves, and not just the Durin boys. The first film worked great for my tastes because, being an actress myself, I love seeing actors and actresses who are so obviously having fun (I wrote a blog on this subject so feel free to check it out) that it makes the film all the more enjoyable. It's pretty clear throughout The Hobbit trilogy that the actors playing the dwarves are enjoying their roles and having a good time.

Herein lies the element that was missing in the final film: the heart. The first film fleshed out the dwarves and gave them personalities that the book didn't; for example, Dori was more refined and Bofur likes to tease Bombur. I loved that these guys were more than just background characters; they were family, they were a team, and they all shared a genuine sense of adventure. Despite Bilbo being the main character, the dwarves brought the heart to the story. This element carried over into The Desolation of Smaug, even when the dwarves split up. They still had that heart, despite more story lines being added and the focus shifting to newer characters.

Now, with The Battle of the Five Armies, the focus shifts heavily to Thorin for the obvious reason of him being the king. After that, the only dwarves that received any serious screen time was Balin, Dwalin, Fili and Kili. The remaining 8 dwarves became the background characters like they were in the book and had few, if any, lines. Once the focus shifted away from the dwarves as a whole, the heart disappeared. We had instead the lingering sense of doom that would eventually come to Thorin, Fili and Kili. Their fate was supposed to break our hearts, which the film certainly did do, but that didn't mean it had to take from the rest of the dwarves.

The previous two films did such a wonderful job of giving the dwarves humanistic qualities besides being stereo-typically stubborn and drunk: the dwarves were loyal, mischievous, valiant, courageous, and honorable. After taking all that effort and screen time, to give 13 dwarves the essence of each one being important to the story and then keeping them in the background for the final chapter took the heart away from the story. Those 8 dwarves deserved better than that.

Hopefully the extended cut that will come out in late 2015 will offer a more satisfying story for the 8 dwarves and bring back at least some of the heart that was so prevalent in the first film, but the extended cut of Smaug didn't include the scene where Bofur drunk himself under the table (which I'm STILL mad about), so my hopes aren't that high. Although it will be disappointing if the heart doesn't appear in the extended cut, it will make sense since Five Armies is, in fact, a war film.

In the meantime, for a brief review, I did enjoy this last film; the first 20 minutes were epic with Smaug's demise and Elrond just being awesome. The rest of the film was good as well, although it seemed to lack a harmonious flow; the different stories seemed to be intercut oddly with notable gaps and a bit too much focus on Alfrid. Seriously, we could've used more dwarves and less Alfrid; he was a plot device that was used well beyond what was needed. Ultimately, with the exception of the lack of heart, it brought a satisfying end to the trilogy.

Why Merida is Overrated

The Disney/Pixar movie Brave featured the newest princess at the time, Merida, and she blew up to become a feminist icon because she demonstrated the typical rebellious attitude and not wanting to take a husband.

When I saw the movie in the theaters, I was very disappointed in her character. Essentially, I thought she was a jerk. I recently had the opportunity to see it again and was able to revise my first impression of her, but I do believe she is overrated as a strong female character. I came up with a title that, in my opinion, I think she is better suited for.

First off, let's take a look at her heritage. She is a Scottish princess from the middle ages. A quote by Walter Scott from his work, Old Mortality, also sums up the Scots quite nicely: "It has often been remarked of the Scottish character, that the stubbornness with which it is moulded shows most to advantage in adversity, when it seems akin to the native sycamore of their hills, which scorns to be biased in its mode of growth even by the influence of the prevailing wind, but, shooting its branches with equal boldness in every direction, shows no weather-side to the storm, and may be broken, but can never be bended." Merida is a very good embodiment of this particular description. She also comes from a time where women across the world were more submissive and often used as political pawns. For a young woman of her time, she is very independent and aspires to become more than she is. These are good traits for strong women to have, especially in children's movies and television.

But here's the clincher on her character: she isn't smart.

Now Merida does have some semblance of brains; she listens to her father and takes his lessons more to heart than her mother's words, and she can easily survive by her wits. The problem with her intelligence is that she is near sighted: she doesn't think past her own circumstances. All she sees is what is happening to her and how she wants things to go her way. She doesn't consider the consequences of her actions and whines about how no one listens to her.

It is true that her mother, Elinor, isn't giving her teenaged daughter's words much heed; but at the same time, Merida isn't listening to her either. Neither woman can find the middle ground to reach out to each other. These two are a matched pair, despite the obvious differences in their character.

Elinor is a product of her time and believes that Merida should act the proper role of a traditional lady. Does this make Elinor a weak character? Not in the least. She may be too focused on marrying her daughter off, but it's more than just the assumed power control that parents are often shown to demonstrate over their kids in movies. What Elinor wants is for Merida to be a good leader, and for an alliance to be made to strengthen their kingdom. She is more far-sighted in being able to see that the good of her family and clan comes first, but not being able to see that her unbending plans aren't the best means of achieving her goals. Like mother, like daughter.

Despite all this, Elinor does command a great presence. She has enough prowess and wisdom to stop fighting clansmen from killing each other, and getting them all to submit to her. Just watch this from 1:56:

She literally parts these ferocious fighting Scotsmen just by walking through them and gets the leaders under control by grabbing them by the ears! Why isn't she getting credit for this? Up until this point in the movie, all we have seen of Merida is how independent and physically capable she is, and how much trouble she can stir up; not only by herself but also with her impish brothers. For Elinor's story, we have seen how proper and traditional she is, but when she takes command of an entire room of angry Scotsmen without losing her cool, she proves that she is a woman of great aptitude.

By promoting Merida before Elinor, the previewed story makes Merida out to be a victim. In reality, both she and her mother are victimizing each other. Each has their own strengths and virtues, but neither one wins when they battle. Both wind up being hurt and more determined to have their way, despite their both knowing what the problem is: they aren't listening to each other. And then, Merida goes over the edge when she humiliates her would-be suitors in the archery contest. A good, strong female character would have the intelligence to know that public humiliation (in any era) would be a bad idea. Merida did not even consider this outcome and made the more immature choice, resulting in humiliating her family and touching off a feud between clans. Proper or not, strong women don't make choices like that; they weigh the options and come up with better strategies; hence the reason why Merida is not a smart character.

Here is the best example of Merida not being smart: her request to the witch. She wants to change her fate by changing her mother! Anyone else see the flaw in this logic? Merida is independent enough to know that fate is her own to change, but she instead chooses to blame her unhappiness on Elinor and change her. In her request to the witch, she doesn't even explain what about her mother to change: she just tells her to change her mother. That could mean any number of changes: physical, as it went down in the movie; personality, in changing every aspect of her thinking; emotionally, changing how she feels about Merida's potential marriage; or even to the extreme of having her removed from Merida's life altogether. Merida doesn't tell the witch how or what to change about her mother. She instead assumes that a spell to change her fate by changing her mother will solve her problem. The request she makes, lacking all specificity, is completely naive.

Now any good tale shows how the hero undergoes a personal change. Once Elinor is transformed into the bear by the witch's fate-changing spell, Merida begins to see the error of her ways. As the two venture off to break the spell, both characters are able to connect because they have to communicate without being able to completely understand Elinor's bear talk. It is when they work together that both characters begin to change and see where the other is coming from. In the end, they are able to compromise when Merida takes her duties as princess seriously to put a stop to the clan fighting but to Elinor's agreement that tradition should be changed and Merida be allowed to make her own decision when she's ready. It is in the middle ground that the two resolve their differences in.

To say that Merida is a good example of a strong female character is premature. Her tale in Brave shows more of teenaged rebellion rather than actual strength. It would be more appropriate to characterize her as becoming a strong female character. Every strong female character in popular culture, such as Buffy Summers or Sarah Conner, all have a story we don't know about and had to grow up at some point. Odds are they weren't always strong, like the aforementioned Conner. Merida's story can be seen as how a strong character is born. At this point in her life, she has learned her lesson and will hopefully continue to grow from there. Instead of being strong from the start, her experiences allowed her to grow into that role.

If Merida's tale were to continue, I'm sure she would eventually become that character that she now has the potential to be. In the meantime, we are left with the journey we were given, which is a tale that we can hope will eventually lead to that greatness.

Disney Movie Workout!

Hi there!

It's been a while since I've posted, and now that I'm unemployed I've finally had more time on my hands to get back to blogging. I went to Ireland last month, and before I left, which also contributes to my lack of posts, I went to the gym almost every day for 6 straight weeks. I wound up losing several pounds and a couple of inches, but the motivation of European travel isn't always available these days,

So, being a multi-tasker, I wanted to do a workout that combined exercise with a TV program or movie. I did a search and found a Star Trek workout which was fun, but it needed to have more scenarios that prompted a workout, as some episodes are more cerebral rather than action oriented. I chose to write up my own for Disney movies instead, although I do plan to do my own Trek one soon.

In terms of a Disney workout, I wanted to put together one that could be used for any Disney movie (Pixar included), and not just the Princess movies. So here’s my attempt, and please feel free to try it; and if you really want to push yourself, try adding 5-10 lb dumbbells with the exercise would be appropriate. If you like it, I’d appreciate the feedback!

A character sings a song – 10 jumping jacks
A song is sung but not by a character in the movie – 20 jumping jacks
True love’s kiss – 30 second plank
A wish comes true – 10 crunches
Magic is used – 10 push ups
Dancing of any kind – 15 jump ropes
A sword fight ensues or a hero battles with a sword – bicycle crunch for 30 seconds
A daring escape is executed or the heroes narrowly survive a dangerous situation – 30 second side plank, 1 set for each side
Horses, carriages, cars, flying or any other kind of transportation is used – 20 jab punches, 10 each side
Each time a character transforms – 10 squats (good luck with Aladdin!)
Showdown with the villain – 20 dead lifts with either hand weights or lightly weighted bar
A death defying fall results in no injuries – hold a squat for 30 seconds
Inanimate objects, plants or any form of nature is alive – 10 skaters
A parent dies – 30 side kicks, 15 each side
A supporting character causes some kind of calamity or is klutzy – 20 pullover crunches
Animals don’t talk but can still communicate with their human friends – 20 high knee jump ropes
Animals talk in front of humans but aren't understood by them – 10 warrior poses
Animals come when called – 5 bridges, hold for 15 seconds each
A disguise is used – 20 side crunches, 10 each side
A character is rescued or saved at the last second – 10 side-shuffle-switches
A lie is told – 15 lunges
The love interests are unwillingly separated from each other – 10 dirty dog/fire hydrant leg raises, 5 each side
There’s a huge betrayal or a good or bad guys turns – 20 mountain climbers
Treasure is involved – 15 reverse crunches
A character gets left or falls behind – 20 push ups
A character isn't dead or is brought back to life – 20 vertical crunches
Someone sacrifices themselves for or defends another character – 20 donkey kicks
A character voiced by Jim Cummings is onscreen – run in place until he’s gone
You spot an Easter egg – 50 jumping jacks

If some of these exercises aren't quite clear, then please make sure to look them up before trying this out. Good luck!

Why Nice Guys Don't Succeed: As Illustrated by The Big Bang Theory

Growing up, I was always the only girl in the boys' group. I was always seen as "one of the guys" and didn't even get a boyfriend until I was almost 20. Can I truly know how self proclaimed "nice guys" feel when as they claim to be unlucky in love? Probably not entirely. But after hearing many guys complain about the "friendzone," what I can do is show some insight on why girls don't seem to go for that kind of persona.

Let me start out with this: I will be using examples from the boys from the hit TV show The Big Bang Theory, but what you should always know is this: NEVER USE TV OR MOVIES TO BASE YOUR EXPECTATIONS ON. These are forms of entertainment with roots in different forms of fantasy. The jerk who did the shooting down in Santa Barbara had the deluded idea that he deserved a hot girl because that's what TV and movies are consistently putting across. Well, guess what, everybody? THIS IS REALITY. Not everything goes smoothly or happily as your favorite TV show or classic movie ends. It's a very sad truth, but Hollywood gives us what they say we want to see. Don't fall under that spell! Live in the now and face the facts of life!

Piggybacking off that point, I now need to add a disclaimer: I am going to be brutally honest in this blog. I'm not going to sugarcoat anything, I'm not going to mince words, and I'm not going to give you false hope or try to change you. I am going to tell it like it is. If you consider yourself sensitive or are set in your ways, then feel free to read another blog that fills you up with false hope with lame cliches. I'm on this soapbox, and I'm doing the talking! And I'm not doing this to discourage so called "nice guys," I'm doing this because I like seeing the "nice guys" find themselves good girls to complete them, and there are too many wolves out there that take the form of "nice guys" and "good girls."

Now then, while TV and movies are completely fictional and outside of reality, they do often feature realistic situations and convincing characters. I am a fan of The Big Bang Theory and, being a geek girl myself who still has a tendency to be socially awkward, I find that all of the characters of Leonard, Raj, and Stuart are prime examples of nice guys who did or are still doing everything wrong. Howard and Sheldon will also be used for other examples, despite the fact that the pre-Bernadette Howard is a complete and total sleazebag and Sheldon just has no idea that a world and other people's needs exist around him. I will not be bagging on these characters, as I do love them, but I will definitely be focusing on their faults because many nice guys exhibit these faults too, and thereby don't succeed when trying to be with a good quality girl.

Prologue: Doing whatever the girl asks and expecting something in return

Everything begins here.

So, you think that fixing her computer, helping her move, and driving her home when she's drunk without copping a feel makes you a nice guy. Right? For the most part, yes. It also makes you a sucker.

Please refer to TBBT season 2 episode 19: The Dead Hooker Juxtaposition. The beautiful actress Alicia moves into the building and meets Leonard and Sheldon. Leonard is instantly attracted to her and uses what little body weight he has to heave a huge box filled with who knows what up 4 flights of stairs while she totes a tiny box that a 4 year old could probably carry. Later, Leonard is joined by Raj and Howard where they are helping Alicia unpack and set up her electronics.

Sound like something you've done? Let's continue...

Notice how in this clip Alicia tells Leonard she needs to drive to Hollywood from Pasadena. She's all dressed up for her audition as a hooker, and quite frankly, isn't far from the mark. She brings up her situation which may or may not be the truth, and Leonard, Howard and Raj follow after her like lovesick puppies. Penny, who does tend to do take advantage of the boys from time to time, notices the extreme that Alicia is taking it to and she interferes because she genuinely cares for the boys.

Now skip to 1.14 of this next clip and stop at 1.36:

Penny asks Alicia to not take advantage of the boys. Alicia's response: "What's the big deal? I let them do stuff for me, they're happy, I get stuff, who cares?" Alicia refuses to acknowledge that she is purposely leading the boys on.

So guys, are you doing this kind of stuff for a girl or girls and getting nothing back?

SHE'S TAKING ADVANTAGE OF YOU, AND YOU'RE LETTING HER DO IT!

Yes, girls appreciate it when you do things like this for her. But if she keeps doing it and never says yes to a date to you, then you are a complete sap. Albert Einstein himself defined insanity as this: "doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." A cold hard truth is that the right type of girl doesn't want to be with someone who she can walk all over. It is very flattering if we can get guys to act as servants or whipping boys, but unless she expresses a way to reciprocate or that she is interested in you, then you are not a "nice guy." You are easily dominated and the epitome of insanity as expressed by one of the greatest minds of the 20th century.

And if you're being a nice guy just because you think you're entitled to sexual favors, like there's some kind of unspoken agreement between men and women, then get your head examined. You may as well be a combination of Sheldon and pre-Bernadette Howard: thinking you're owed booty because the world supposedly revolves around you and you never get your way. That's not how true nice guys work, and it's not how women work either.

As I said, I'm going to pull no punches here. If this was too hard of a truth for you, then please, go read something else. If you're a trooper, then please continue.

Underlying Reasons Why You're Not Getting the Girl

Doing nice things for the girl or girls you have your eye on is a good place to start, but it really should be only a testing ground rather than a habit. There are many nice girls out there who appreciate what you do but are uncomfortable in the situation because they don't want to hurt your feelings, so they let you keep doing what you do because they don't want to lose your friendship. Others are like the aforementioned Alicia.

If you're in this situation, but you aren't sure if the girl is trying to be considerate of your feelings or taking advantage of you, then please evaluate the following personality traits below as portrayed by our boys of TBBT. For the record, I'm going to be picking on these guys a lot. This doesn't mean that I don't like them, because I do; it just means that these boys are very flawed characters whose choices make the best examples of the points I'm trying to make.

Problem: you have no self respect

Season 4 episode 5: The Desperation Emanation. No clip of this particular example is available. Leonard is set up by Bernadette on a blind date with a gym acquaintance named Joy. Joy has little class, is crude, and is constantly showing off krav maga moves dangerously close to Leonard's lower regions. As she leaves the table for the bathroom, Howard remarks that he thinks she likes him. Leonard retorts that he won't go after her because he has self respect. Howard's spot on response: "Since when?"

Now Leonard had a horrible childhood and has mommy issues, and you guys out there have your own unique back stories and histories with women; but this particular point is very important, regardless of your experience. Back to Leonard: he always wants a woman's attention, and if a woman is willing to give it, he pursues it, regardless of who he has his eye on, or in some cases, who he's currently with.

Here's a clip of the type of woman Joy is:

Guys, would you say yes to a second date to a woman like this if she offered the possibility of having drunk sex with you on a wedding date?

Leonard did. The date from this point in the clip above did not improve, but when Joy tells him that her inhibitions will drop when she gets drunk at a wedding she wants him to take her to, all his previous reservations evaporate quicker than the rain in California's current drought status.

Another good example is Leonard's relationship with Stephanie. It the 3 episode arc of season 2 episodes 8-10, Leonard gets involved with the girl Howard was expecting to shack up with. They become an official couple, and by using subtle means, Stephanie slowly transfers her things to Leonard's room and moves in with him. Sheldon figures it out, but Leonard denies it. When he realizes the control she's taking over him, he tries to talk her into slowing their relationship down. She offers him sex each time and he's a complete goner.

And now, the coup de gras:

Stephanie is a master manipulator who induces guilt and offers sex to get her way, and Leonard falls into her trap each time because he doesn't respect himself enough to take a stand. Of all the people in the world, he needs to be able to stand up for himself, and he fails miserably. He eventually is able to end the relationship, but we don't get to see how it happened because she, once again, offered him sex to change his mind when he desperately tried to text-dump her.

As stated with Alicia, many girls out there aren't as nice or as good as they seem and they take advantage of perfectly good guys, thereby causing bitterness and anger to fester. Real women don't want pliable men that they can easily manipulate or just agree with them on any and all subjects; that kind of man gets old pretty quick and then these ladies scope out their next target to suck him dry while you wonder what you did wrong when the only thing you did wrong was chase a bad girl. The women worth having out there need a man who has respect for and can stand up for himself. After all, if a guy can't stand up for himself, how can any woman be confident that you'll be able to stand up for her?

If you're having trouble getting any kind of romantic relationship started with a woman, first take a look at yourself and see if you have the personal strength to take a stand for yourself. Are you confident in the person that you are? Can you tell your boss you can't stay overtime for the 5th day in a row because you have plans? Can you think clearly when a pretty girl smiles at you? Are you able to still say no if a woman whose clothing leaves nothing to the imagination wants to use you and then throw you away? If your answer to any of these questions is no, then you should take some time to re-evaluate your approach not only to women but to life.

Self respect is a key personality trait needed to survive. Without it, it's not just women who will take advantage of you, it's whoever else is in your life. Learn to know when to say yes and no for yourself. Don't let any person or that girl you've had your eye on make you do things you don't want to.

Problem: you're whiny or induce guilt

When we first meet Stuart in season 2, he seems relatively confident when he is able to take Penny out on a date. Then she hooks up with Leonard and we see Stuart's true colors: he is lonely and lets the whole world know about it. Raj does the same thing. This happens both when Raj is drunk and sober, but when he whines about his love life he tends to rant about his whole existence and how he'll never find someone.

Guys, whining never helps. It makes you look immature. You know how I mentioned that Stephanie was manipulative? Well, if you really think about it, whining is, in its own way, a form of manipulation. Whining is a device to induce pity. Pity, when given, immediately puts you in a position of power over the person who is now giving you attention and trying to empathize with you. Most people, men and women alike, can tell the different between asking for help and just being a whiner; and let me tell you that when they're wise to your pity game, you won't incur any good responses.

If you watch this clip, you notice how awkward everyone gets when Stuart starts whining in his speech. Not only was this a completely inappropriate time for him to bring this comparison up, but it also caused a "Debbie Downer" moment that made everyone feel awkward.

When you're feeling down and you want to whine, do it in a safe environment or with friends who will offer you support. It's a natural part of life to need to release, but using it to attract a woman is just lame. She'll either see right through you and immediately write you off as a irritating little twerp, or she'll fall under the pity spell, in which case you become a bad guy (and if you've seen The Silence of the Lambs, you'll see how pity gets a lady kidnapped! YES, it's that bad!).

Here's an example from a non-regular on the show: Bert.

Bert shows up in season 7 episode 13: The Occupation Recalibration, and seems like a nice, awkward guy at first, bringing Amy pretty rocks from the geology department. If you watch his technique, he starts off with very subtle whining, then twisting it into guilt, saying that girls always turn down guys like him because he's big and awkward. Guys, regardless of whether or not it is true that you're always being turned down, this tactic is uncool. There is a difference between being honest in getting to know a person, and being honest to manipulate that person. Bert uses the latter technique and when Amy caves, he instantly labels their outing as a date. So not cool!

And, of course, this portion wouldn't be complete without this little gem from season 4 episode 9: The Boyfriend Complexity:

Raj is very drunk in this scene, so his actions aren't completely under his control. He is completely honest and uninhibited as he talks about how lonely he is, and Bernadette tries to cheer him up by telling him that lots of girls would like to kiss him. Well, we all see how that one pans out. Guys, don't get drunk and whine about your lack of a love life. This scene right here is a great example the least of the things that can go wrong when you mix alcohol and loneliness. Even drunk, whining is tacky. Don't go that route.

So if you think that making yourself look pathetic is a good move for getting girls sucker girls into pity dates with you is a good tactic, then think again. It's uncool, totally classless to pull a stunt like that, and it definitely does NOT make you a nice guy.

Problem: you're pushy

Leonard starts out the series as a good guy who lacks confidence around women. Now, he's still a good guy but earned the confidence he needed to get engaged to Penny. The journey to that point, however, was often derailed when Leonard wouldn't let go of a conflict. The best example? When he first told Penny he loved her in season 3 episode 19: The Wheaton Recurrence. 

Penny's reaction is not what Leonard had expected. Later in the episode she remarks "I love chili fries," and Leonard goes off on a tirade on how she can have such strong feelings for food and not for him, which ignites a fight between them. She explains the next day that she has had bad experiences saying those three little words at the wrong time and doesn't want to mess things up by running in to fast.

Guys, if a girl tells you she has had experiences in the past that cause her to go slow for any reason, LET HER GO AT HER OWN PACE.

There are lots of dumb women out there who never learn their lessons. If you find a woman who, for any reason, needs to take time for any action in your relationship, such as saying she loves you, because she learned her lesson the hard way; then that means she has learned her lesson and doesn't want to ruin things with you. Seriously! If you've spent all this time trying to win her over as Leonard did with Penny and you try to push her to tell you that you love her? Then Penny's dumping Leonard is exactly the same reaction you'll get! You can't force a woman to say what you want her to say or do what you want her to do if she isn't ready!

Another example of Leonard being pushy was with Priya. Now I watched every episode from start to finish and I don't think that Priya ever really planned on anything long term with Leonard, I think she wanted an American play toy that she could dominate; else she wouldn't have cheated on him so easily when she returned to India. Despite this theory, she did make a good point in that her parents would freak out if they knew about her relationship with Leonard. I don't know much about Indian customs, but I do know that foreign countries all have their views on how marriages and relationships should go for their children, and Priya's wanting to wait till one of her other siblings screws up to tell her parents about Leonard is a perfectly sound excuse.

In this clip, you'll not only see Leonard trying to push his own agenda with Priya, but also Sheldon's acknowledgement that Leonard does this kind of thing all the time. Even by this time, in the latter half of season 4, Leonard still hasn't learned his lesson from nearly a year ago with Penny. At the end of this episode, he's arguing with Priya because he says she thinks he embarrasses her. I don't think that is completely true, but I could be wrong. In any case, being pushy like this is not only a turnoff, it's bloody immature.

I finally have an example that doesn't involve Leonard: Raj and Lucy. Lucy has an extreme social disorder that she is bravely trying to conquer. Raj tries to help her along, but does so at his pace and not one she's comfortable with. When he tried helping her with returning "funky" crab cakes on their date by insisting she return them to the waiter, she tried to escape out the bathroom window because it was too much for her to handle! Watch this clip from season 6 episode 24: The Bon Voyage Reaction, of when he introduces Lucy to Amy:

Raj thinks he's being protective of Lucy, but he's only exacerbating the situation further. He's not only coming off as pushy, but overbearing and just plain rude. Lucy is clearly not comfortable when he interferes with her conversation with Amy. If Raj hadn't been so pushy, he probably wouldn't have been text dumped later on in the episode. Raj had good intentions, but the best intentions don't always produce the best results.

Like the point with whining, being pushy is another form of manipulation. If you try to push a woman into doing something she isn't ready for, are you going to keep pushing until she cowers? Will you dump her if she doesn't do your bidding? Leonard and Raj aren't that type of guy, but there are too many men out there who are. Don't be pushy. It never ends well for either party.

Problem: you think every woman who is nice to you has feelings for you

Please now view this clip from Scrubs to get the point I'm making:

Seriously, how delusional can you be?

I'm going to divert from the nice guys here and pick on Howard. Howard, before he got engaged to Bernadette, was the epitome of a deluded romantic who did everything wrong that a man can do to impress a girl. He fancied himself as some kind of smooth ladies' man, when in reality, he was a borderline stalker creep. Tune in at 1.48 on this next clip from season 3 episode 6: The Cornhusker Reaction:

A random runner just so happens to make eye contact with Howard and she's jogging by and smiles at him. Howard thinks it means something and chases afterward!

Now let me say right here that I truly believe that majority of the population of men on this planet are smarter than that; but the point I am trying to make here is that chance encounters that take only a few seconds to meet and fall in love are fantasy. The number of decent, friendly people in this world is diminishing every day, but there are people, both men and women, who, when they make accidental eye contact with a complete stranger, will offer a friendly smile so not to appear awkward or just try to make your day a little brighter. If a girl notices you and acknowledges you with any friendly gesture such as a smile or wave, don't start making wedding plans. She's just being friendly. Odds are you'll probably not come across that random lady again unless you go up and talk to her. If you do decide to try to talk without being a stalker, proceed with caution, as many joggers can sport pepper spray now, even if your intentions are pure.

For the more likely situation, see this clip from season 5 episode 1: The Skank Reflex Analysis:

Bernadette is just a nice person, and in my opinion, one of the most realistic characters out on the airwaves right now. She is particularly nice to Raj because she knows he's lonely and sensitive, and he spends the latter half of season 4 pining over her with disturbing poetry and Bollywood dance-filled fantasies. His feelings for her come out after his drunken night with Penny, and Bernadette's fury comes at Raj in full force. He says that she was "always so nice to him," and she retorts with "I'm nice to everybody!!!!" Guys, if you're lonely and you have the one gal pal who is always nice to you, keep in mind that she probably doesn't have feelings for you. Genuinely nice people are fewer these days, and if you're lucky enough to have a girl friend in your life who's willing to give you a woman's perspective and just be a friend when you need it, then why ruin that? If she becomes interested, it will happen naturally. Do not assume that it will happen!

Guys, please please please get it through your head that some girls are just plain nice without expecting to hook up with you at some point in the future! You are deluding yourself, and you can do the worst thing possible in the process: lose her friendship. If you make your feelings known to her with no expectations, and she turns you down, then man up and do the mature thing in moving on. You took your chance, and it didn't work. Is pushing your agenda worth losing her over? Men and women can still be friends if she doesn't want to go out with you!

Problem: you lie or omit pertinent information

I don't even need to refer to TBBT here, just watch 75% of every romance film out there: the liar always get their due, but almost always still winds up with the love interest (hence the reason why these romance stories are fiction). If you lie in this digital age, you could find your face smeared all over Facebook, Twitter and Instagram with a huge "do not date" caption. Don't believe me? Check out this tweet from Mrs. Doubtfire's Mara Wilson.

There are very rare times in life where lying is necessary, but even then it may still tarnish your reputation. So how does lying torch you when you've found someone? Here's a few examples, as all of the characters in this show do their own fair share of lying.

Season 3, episode 3: The Gothowitz Deviation. Howard and Raj wear fake tattoo sleeves and crash a goth club to pick up on goth chicks. By lying about their lifestyles, tattoos and being goths instead of nerds, they have to keep of the pretense of getting inked so that the remote odds of either Howard or Raj scoring stays in their favor.

Howard can't keep up the pretense when he hears that tattoo needle near his hiney and blurts the whole truth out, and both girls leave. Telling the truth is always noble, but it won't always save you when you fess up to your dishonesty.

Moving on to Leonard. Leonard in season 5 episode 7: The Good Guy Fluctuation, he meets Alice, and claims to be what most of you claim to be: a good guy. But he has his girlfriend Priya back in India, and he wants to be with Alice now that she's in his life. When he talks to Penny about his dilemma, he talks about how he wants both women despite his being a "good guy." In reality, he's trying to have his cake and eat it too. Guys, that never works. And here's what happens when Leonard tries it:

Alice thought he was a good guy too, but trying to pull a stunt like that didn't fly with her. She thought he was different. Guys, if you're that kind of "different," then show it and be it! If you are lucky enough to have a woman in your life and another wants you and you don't tell her about your girlfriend right away, then you are not a good guy. You're a wolf in sheep's clothing.

This next one is the most complicated lie that begins a domino effect: season 4 episode 6: The Irish Pub Formulation. Leonard broke a pact with Howard when he slept with Raj's sister, Priya. Sheldon finds out, and being one who doesn't like to lie or keep secrets, tries to pull another one of his "unravellable" lies to protect the parties involved. Watch what happens:

One lie gets exposed, leading all four guys to expose the lies of the other guys at the table. This is as close to the ideal situation of how lies can be forgiven without massive ramifications, but these guys are all friends. Lying to your guy friends is one thing; lying to any girl you want to impress is completely different. Your buddies are supposed to be there through thick and thin, and while you shouldn't lie to anyone, especially not these guys, they'll be more forgiving because that's what friends do. If you lie to try impressing women, they'll be far less gracious than your pals. Great relationships never start on the foundation of a lie.

Problem: you knowingly and willingly allow yourself to be taken advantage of

This particular problem ties in with most of the points I've already made. Let's face it: being alone sucks. The thing about being alone though is that it's almost always something you can do something about, whether reaching out to friends and/or family, posting on a social site, or going out to new venues and mixers to meet new friends.

The easier and far more degrading option is when someone is giving you attention because they want something from you, like money or material goods. Remember Christie?

Tune in at 2.42 of season 1 episode 7: The Dumpling Paradox. Christie, Penny's acquaintance from Nebraska, has no morals or standards, which makes her perfect for Howard. Penny, although she can't stand Howard during this phase in his life, still tries to stop him from falling under Christie's spell because she will only use him to get things. And Howard is okay with that!

If you're okay with this kind of situation, then please tell your family so they can form an intervention. No one deserves to be treated that way, regardless of whether or not they are aware that they are being used. Moving on to the next example from season 5 episode 4: The Wiggly Finger Catalyst:

Once again, Penny is trying to keep her guy friends from bad girls. Originally, she hooked Raj up with Emily due to his inability to talk to women and the fact that Emily is deaf so he wouldn't have to talk. After he pays off Emily's credit card bills and buys her a new car, Penny realizes what she's done and tries (unsuccessfully, due to Howard's wandering eye) to talk to Emily and get her to be more careful with Raj. Instead, Howard just signs to her "are you a gold digger or not?" and sends Emily into a rage. Penny then takes the next step of intervention and calls Raj's parents, who make him choose between love or money, and he chooses Emily, who promptly dumps him because he won't buy her anything else.

Seriously guys, just because Madonna glorified being a "Material Girl" doesn't mean it's a good thing. In fact, don't even take Madonna's advice on anything. Moving right along....Raj refuses to accept the truth that's staring him right in the face. The more he lavished on Emily, the happier she was, and the more ignorant he became. Don't ever let any woman do this to you. You deserve better than that! Do I REALLY need to include the following clip to show you how you'll wind up if you let a girl take advantage of you?

Do you really want this to be you?


The Final Word

You're still here? I told you I was gonna be blunt. Now I will apologize if I seemed harsh, but sometimes you need to be harsh to get a point across if you're not getting it from people who are trying to be nice. If you're really a nice guy, then be a nice guy. If you have to convince a girl that you're a nice guy, whether with actions or words, then you're not genuine. Real nice guys do things out of the goodness of their heart without asking for anything in return. And truth be told, we need more people like that; not just men.

So nice guys, I'm not going to give you some cliche that you're probably sick of hearing, I'm just going to say to please consider the girl and how she feels. Most of the mistakes listed above were when the guys did what they thought would work to get out of the friendzone and failed miserably. The real reason why "nice guys" don't finish first is because they don't consider the pressure they put the nice girls under. A real nice guy is the one who will not put a girl in any position that she does not want to be in. And if a girl is or has treated you that way in the past, then draw on that experience and think of the girl being in your place.

This last piece of my blog is for everyone: being a "nice" person all comes down to putting the other's feelings and needs before yours. Anything less than that, or doing anything for your own personal gain, immediately shoves you hard out of that "nice" label. We need more genuine nice guys and gals, people! It may mean we'll be single longer, but a change like this can make a big difference! Don't make the mistakes our favorite nerds did! They may be great for hi-jinks, but not in the real world!